Invisible Leis of Love


The Invisible Leis of Love tradition was created in March 2018 while I was officiating a wedding for a couple at He’eia State Park. In February 2018 I was contacted by the bride whose fiance is in the military and was deployed. When he returned in March 2018 they wanted to get married. I worked with the bride to create their ceremony which was to include a lei exchange at the start of the ceremony to symbolize each of them giving their love and themselves to one another. The wedding couple had a bridal party and someone from the bridal party was supposed to carry the leis for the lei exchange. On the day of the wedding when the ceremony began and I started to read the lei exchange part, the bride whispered to me in a panic that they forgot the leis back in the bridal suite.

​Without skipping a beat I turned to the guests and said:
“The couple wanted to have a lei exchange to start their ceremony but unfortunately the leis were forgotten. In Life things do not always go as planned and you have to just go with the flow and make the best of every situation. So we are going to continue the ceremony as planned and the couple will be using invisible leis of love for the lei exchange.”

This took the panic away from the wedding couple and made them smile. When it came time for the groom to place his lei on his bride he drew a circle in the air and placed it on her like a lei while kissing her on the cheek. Then when it was time for the bride to place her lei on her groom she drew a heart and placed it on him like a lei while kissing him on the cheek. The couple exchanging invisible leis of love rather than real leis actually made for a more meaningful and special lei ceremony. The mother of the bride came up to me after the wedding to tell me how she thought that her daughter was going to break down when the leis were forgotten but my quick thinking saved the day and made the ceremony so much more special. The bride told me that I turned a mistake into a happy memory they will always remember fondly!

Bride and Groom wearing their Invisible Leis of Love

​Since the wedding I have been thinking about what a great alternative invisible leis of love would be for other couples to do instead of the traditional lei exchange. The Invisible Leis of Love ceremony can be done anywhere in the world, it doesn’t require anything special, and doesn’t cost anything! I connected with the bride since the wedding when she shared with me again how special the invisible leis of love and the entire ceremony were to her, her husband, and her family. I mentioned to her that I think a new wedding tradition may have been started at their ceremony and that I was going to share their experience and the Invisible Leis of Love ceremony with other couples. I also suggested they could start a tradition to exchange invisible leis of love on their anniversary, or anytime either of them needed a smile! They are accessible anywhere, anytime and they will bring back happy memories of their wedding day. She thought it was a great idea to share this tradition with other couples and absolutely loved the idea of incorporating it as a tradition on their wedding anniversaries!

The Invisible Leis of Love ceremony is incorporate into a wedding, vow renewal, elopement, or civil union ceremony just like a traditional lei exchange. When it comes time for the couple to exchange leis each of the couple just draws their lei in the air before adorning it on their sweetie. I recommend drawing a heart shaped lei, it makes for an extra special touch! Then make doing an Invisible Leis of Love exchange a tradition on your anniversaries to relive your happy day and reaffirm your love and commitment to one another.


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